Attitude of Gratitude 28

1. I am grateful that my BYU cougars beat the Utes! And even though we kinda sucked, (what does that say about the Utes since we still won?) it was a fun and exciting game.

2. I am grateful that my kids love music so much. It's fun to listen to and play music with them. And I love that they love ALL kinds of music.

Attitude of Gratitude 27

1. I am grateful that I got to participate in the craziness that is Black Friday. Why we do this to ourselves year after year, I will never know. And, I always vow to never do it again. But it is the fun and the tradition and the togetherness with my sisters and mom. This year we never even went to bed at all. Stupid retailers--upping their opening times every year.

2. I am extremely grateful that none of us died or got seriously injured in the craziness that is Black Friday. Seriously people, insanity!

3. I am grateful that there are certain sales available online. Ooh, that was much nicer to just sit in my warm, cozy house ordering what I needed instead of standing in yet another eternally long line.

Attitude of Gratitude 26

1. I am grateful for such a sweet holiday as Thanksgiving. Who doesn't like to eat lots of yummy foods? I love the eating, the togetherness, the ad shopping/planning, and the reminder of all that is good that I should be grateful for.

2. I am grateful for family. It is nice to have extended family around from both sides --well most of the time. But this week it just was.

3. I am grateful for days when dinner is as simple as getting in the car and driving a short distance.

Attitude of Gratitude 25

1. I am grateful for Sprite. I know, weird, but lately I have been craving the refreshing, cool taste. Even more than Pepsi (which I love). Hmmm, weird. Wonder what that means?

2. I am grateful for quiet nights and a big, warm bed to get comfy in.

3. I am grateful for texting. I love getting a text, email, letter--anything that simply shows how much someone cares.

Attitude of Gratitude 24

1. I am grateful for Natalie (Tanner's girlfriend) who brought me CD's of all the Glee songs! Now I can listen in my car as well as at home on the computer. (Silly, guilty pleasure). Natalie knew I liked the show and music, and just showed up with them. Sweet!

2. I am grateful for the times like this where I hear the little boys playing nicely together (instead of fighting). They always want to be together, but it's just nice when that togetherness is peaceful. Even more, when I witness an "I love you" or a hug. Wow. Gives me warm tingles.

3. I am grateful for family traditions. Even though I work this Thanksgiving, I am so looking forward to shopping and going out to breakfast the morning after with my mom and sisters. Even tired, I wouldn't miss it!

Attitude of Gratitude 23

1. I am grateful to have such fun friends at work. It really makes the time go by. We have a great time, especially at 2am. Crazy!

2. I am grateful for the holiday season. Craziness, money and stress aside, it really makes it nice to be able to rejuvenate, reconnect with old friends, and just enjoy those feelings of gratitude and giving.

3. I am grateful that I have a working computer that allows me to get online to blog, pay bills, listen to music, look up sales/ads, find new recipes, reconnect with family/friends, and so much more!

Attitude of Gratitude 22

1. I am grateful I was able to see the Real Salt Lake win the MLS 2009 Cup! It was so fun to watch the end of this game which ended in a tie and went into penalty kicks. Real won in a sudden death round! Utah has finally won a sports Championship game! Yippee! And the team is only in their 5th year, which is amazing. And even more amazing, we beat LA Galaxy with Beckham (as in "Bend it Like Beckham") and Donovan--major names in soccer right now! Wow!

2. I am grateful for Health Insurance. Having spent all of yesterday in the ER, I am so glad I know most of the expense will be covered. I am grateful that I will have one less thing to stress about. Holidays are stressful enough financially, I don't need something else to worry about.

3. I am grateful for lessons that remind me of things I need to be reminded of. For example, doing something nice for others. Service. Being kind. Helpful. I think I will re-read the "Christmas Jars" to remind me of the need to share and help others, especially during this holiday time. I think I will also plan something with my little kids-25 Days of Christmas, where we choose one nice thing to do for someone else, each day in December (until Christmas). Ooh, now I'm excited!

Attitude of Gratitude 21

1. I am grateful for nights out with James' friends from high school. It's awesome that most of them have moved back to town (or close by), and that the wives get along just as well as the guys. We always have a great time!

2. I am grateful for Volleyball. It's a lot of fun to play, especially with good friends. It's also fun to watch a good game. Even though we are getting older and are all much more easily injured, it's fun to get out there, get moving, get physical, and just play something!

3. I am grateful that my horrific, awful pain was only kidney stones. Yes, that is bad enough--in fact, was quite horrible, but at least it wasn't something permanent that ended up with me in the hospital for days. It was one of the absolute worst, most painful things I have ever endured, but at least I got to go home and felt better hours later. I do still need to follow up with a Urologist to make sure there's nothing more, but overall, I feel good. And I'm grateful that was all.

Attitude of Gratitude 20

1. I am grateful that I got to go see "New Moon" early with my sis. We had such a great time. And the movie was much better than the first one. As crappy as these movies are, it was fun to see the story laid out in front of us.

2. I am grateful for Joe Bandido's chips and salsa. They are so delicious! It's easy to get carried away and eat WAY too many.

3. I am grateful for Strawberry Daiquiris (Virgin of course). Yum!

Attitude of Gratitude 19

1. I am grateful that we are a 3-car family. It's so nice not to have to worry about taking Tanner to school, rehab, etc. And...to have an extra driver that can help pick up kids if needed. Makes life much more simple.

2. I am grateful that the new road out to Wal-mart/Springville exit is finally open. It has been closed for almost a year and has been such an inconvenience. I'm glad that they made it double lanes both ways. Makes it so much nicer to get where we need to get without major detours.

3. I am grateful that my kids are such good students and smart kids. They get such good grades. I never have to worry about detention/notes/calls from teachers. They just do well and have good citizenship as well.

Attitude of Gratitude 18

1. I am grateful for a washer and dryer. As much as I hate doing laundry, can you imagine having to scrub all your clothes on an old fashioned wash board and then hang them to dry? How much more time consuming and annoying than the currently annoying job that it is.

2. I am grateful for blogging. It is a great way to keep up with friends as well as keep up with my life. My journal, so to speak. It is much easier to post our family experiences as well as my personal thoughts and feelings than writing it all down. Don't get me wrong, I still occasionally like writing in my journal, but this just feels right, for now.

3. I am grateful for new recipes to try when I get in the mood to bake or make a cool, new treat. The little boys and I tried a new, easy cheesecake recipe that I found here. Loved it. And super simple.

Easy Cheesecake

Ingredients:

1 graham cracker pie crust

8 oz. soft cream cheese
1/3 c. sugar
2 tsp. vanilla
1 c. sour cream
8 oz. Cool Whip, slightly thawed

1. Beat cream cheese until smooth, add sugar and mix well. Add sour cream and vanilla, mix well. Fold in Cool Whip.

2. Spoon into pie crust and chill for 4 hours.

Attitude of Gratitude 17

1. I am grateful for the ability to think for myself. The ability to feel for myself. To come up with ideas and thoughts and plans that I want to do.

2. I am grateful for a Crock Pot and the ability to have dinner ready by 8:30 am. No thinking about it for the rest of the day. Just eat when ready!

3. I am grateful for music and for playlist that allows you to look up and listen to whatever music you want. You can create your own playlists to listen to over and over. Love it! Love that the kids also love it and look up, listen to and sing all kinds and genres of music.

Attitude of Gratitude 16

1. I am grateful for fun shows that just make me happy inside. Shows that let me escape and just enjoy something different, such as "Glee".

2. I am grateful that we had such great weather for the State Championship football game on Saturday. It was perfect weather. Great game, even though they didn't win. What a great season Springville had. We (as a town) are proud of them for getting so far!

3. I am grateful that I can have a day today to catch up on my Gratitude posts. I've really gotten behind and it's not because I'm not grateful. Just been busy. I will really try to stay on top of it this next couple weeks. Love being grateful for so many things.

Attitude of Gratitude Day 15

1. I am grateful that my kids love to play with their cousins--on both sides. I'm so glad that they have cousin "friends" their same age.

2. I am grateful I live in a state with beautiful mountains surrounding the valley. When we lived out of state, my sense of direction was so messed up without the mountains to ground me. There's just something about those mountains that says, "Home."

3. I am grateful for Football. Especially when you can claim a team. It just makes me happy inside to watch and cheer for my favorite teams or players-all the way from Flag Football, to High School, to NCAA to NFL. Love it!

New Moon Preview!

Ha! Yes it is only 11:00 pm and I just got home from New Moon! Yep, you heard right. I went to a special showing of New Moon for IHC employees at 8pm tonight. I had won tickets and took one of my sisters. It was still cheesy at times but much, much better than the first. I really liked it! And, even though I am definitely (and will always be) an Edward gal, Jacob was HOT in this movie! I considered briefly changing sides --just momentarily, but wow! Just had to say that. And for those of you on "Team Jacob", you will LOVE this movie! That's all I'm saying.

Attitude of Gratitude Day 14

1. I am grateful to have a day with absolutely NOTHING to do but stay inside where it's nice and warm and watch football. I love that the snow can't get me down. It's nice to look at...from inside my house!

2. I am grateful I was able to sort through and clean out my closet...and more importantly that I have enough clothes to actually sort through and get rid of. I'm grateful I can take my unneeded items to the DI so someone else can benefit from them.

3. I am grateful for pumpkin chocolate chip cookies. They are delicious and easy to make! Yum!

Attitude of Gratitude Day 13

1. I am grateful to live in an area that has four seasons. As much as I hate winter and the cold, I do love the beauty of it and love how it makes Spring that much more welcomed when it finally arrives. And Christmas just isn't Christmas without snow!

2. I am grateful to have a roof over my head. And even though it may not be my dream home, it has potential, and it's a home! There's nothing better than having a nice, warm house to come home to.

3. I'm grateful to have a few days where I actually get in a cleaning and organizing mood. It doesn't happen very often (I'm usually so tired), but when it does, it just feels nice.

Attitude of Gratitude Day 12

1. I am grateful that I got to go watch the Semi-Finals in the High School State Playoffs. And that my Springville Red Devils won and are going to the State Championship game next Friday! It is so fun to see them doing well. First time in 24 years! Go you Mighty Red Devils!

2. I am grateful that I have the next few days off so I can catch up on life and spend some time with my boys. Sometimes you just need to have time to chill.

3. I am grateful for the beautiful fall colors and the rain that we received today. I love rain. Love the smell of rain. Love that you can just get cozy in a blanket and listen to the falling raindrops outside your window.

Attitude of Gratitude Day 11

1. I am grateful for a heart that feels joy AND pain. It's nice to feel something. Something is better than nothing. I'm glad I can choose my feelings and how I will react to a situation just by changing my attitude or looking deeper into myself.

2. I am grateful for the use of my arms and legs. My foot was hurting for a few days, and it made me realize that even though I don't LOVE to run, I LOVE being able to run if I feel like it. I love to have the freedom to use my body as I choose without limitations. Getting older is hard on your body, and I am grateful to still feel pretty good most days!

3. I am grateful for silly Peyton. He is fun to talk to and will always be my baby. I love that he has a GREAT sense of humor and can make anyone laugh. He likes to tease his brothers, but he sure livens things up!

Attitude of Gratitude Day 10

1. I am grateful that I have a decent job that helps to support my family. I am grateful that I listened to that prompting to go back to school when I did and that I chose a profession that is always needed-Nurses. (Especially in Labor & Delivery). People are still having babies. I love that I am good at my job and hope I continue to get better.

2. I am grateful for the "Thank You Holiday" bonus that I just found out I am getting at work! It will help with Christmas a bit.

3. I am grateful for TiVo so I can watch TV shows later with my family and I don't miss out just because I'm working nights. I love that my family all loves to sit down and watch shows together.

Attitude of Gratitude Day 9

I've been working, and missed a few days (which I've promised myself I will catch up on), but here are my three "joys" today.

1. I am grateful for the DI (or any second-hand store) where I can feed my book addiction for a fraction of the price. The boys also like going and browsing, but today, I went alone. It was great to just browse at my own speed and look at what I wanted to look at. Got some great shoes for only $6 which are super cute (will try to post a picture later), and several books. (Shhh, don't tell my hubby!)

2. I am grateful for the words and more importantly the meaning of "I'm sorry." I'm grateful that we are able to forgive each other and try just a little harder to be better.

3. I am grateful to have a night off and to be able to relax with my family watching some TV .

Attitude of Gratitude Day 8

1. I'm grateful that for the first time in a long time I don't feel like I'm living "paycheck to paycheck". Don't get me wrong, we still have some debt, but it's nice to know that even in this economy, we're ok.

2. I am grateful for Kade. At fourteen, he is already such an entreprenuer. If he wants something, he will find a way to earn the money to go buy it. He knows what he wants and is not afraid to go out and get it. He is smart and I know he WILL be successful. I love that he likes to read! AND I love that he has chosen this week to FINALLY clean up his room! :)

3. I'm grateful for a sister that I can talk to that just "gets me" (I have a few). But today I am grateful that April and I are on the same page most of the time. Both being nurses and working graveyards, we just have a similar life --except she is super woman and super mom, but that aside, it's nice to be able to chat.

Attitude of Gratitude Day 7

1. I'm grateful for Tanner. At 17, he is so perceptive and kind and understanding. He knows when I am upset and always gives me a kiss on the cheek and tells me that he loves me. What teenage boy does that? I feel like we can talk about anything and feel like he is totally honest with me. He's smart, athletic and just an all around good kid. Love my teenagers.

2. I'm grateful for being able to sleep in. Whether I work the night before or not, I am able to sleep because all my boys are in full-time school. I love that they get themselves up and ready. Even the little ones. Since graveyard shift just messes me up all around, I'm grateful that this is one less stress in my life.

3. I am grateful for Dawson. He always likes to hang out with Mom or Dad. He is smart and talented and likes to have fun. He always has a mischievous smile on his face. He always wants to play games or sports and tries to recruit anyone he can to play as well.

Attitude of Gratitude 6

1. And just a few more simple things that bring me joy:
...When my boys tell me they love me.

2. ...Fat juicy veins to start an IV in. (The nurse in me)

3. ...Going out to dinner at any restaurant, especially PF Chang's (lettuce wraps-Yum!)

Attitude of Gratitude 5

1. More simple things that bring me joy:
...Clean sheets on my bed.

2. ...French Toast with maple syrup.

3. ...Baking powder biscuits dipped in hot chocolate.

Attitude of Gratitude 4

1. I am grateful for the simple things that truly bring me joy;
...Hot cocoa on a cold day.

2. ...Warm clothes out of the dryer--and even more when the little boys want to cuddle and hide in the warm clothes out of the dryer.

3. ...Clean clothes that smell "Snuggly" fresh.

Attitude of Gratitude Day 3

Wow, today I'm feeling pretty crappy and down. All the more reason to be grateful, right? So here are some simple things that bring me joy.

1. I am grateful for hair color that helps take away the gray. I'm way too young for gray hair anyway, so it's not really cheating, right?

2. I am grateful for these last few warm days allowing me to get the garden cleared out before the cold and snow hit.

3. I am grateful that I don't always feel this melancholy. How depressing and hopeless would it be to not truly believe that better days lie ahead. I know I bring this emotional low on myself, and really it's nothing major--just one of those days, ya know?

Attitude of Gratitude Day 2

1. I am grateful for a sister-in-law that is always available. She is amazing and selfless. She was willing to cut Peyton's hair on Halloween just so he would look like Spock. Then at a moment's notice, she cut it again today into a more "normal" hair cut. She stays busy, stays fit, keeps her house clean, volunteers in the PTA, teaches RS, is everything to her kiddos, and still manages to ALWAYS think of others. I love just chatting with her and feel we have a special connection. Thanks Jen. Love ya!

2. I am grateful for modern technology. More specifically, computers and cell phones. The ability to look up and print ANYTHING. The ability to immediately talk to friends and family through phone, text, email, etc. Having the whole world's knowledge at my fingertips. I love being able to create my own playlists that allow me to listen to ANY combination of music I want while cleaning, running or just hanging out. I love having a cell phone available for emergencies and that my kids are able to call me whenever, wherever.

3. I am grateful for food. I love eating. Love being able to cook or buy food. Love that my family is not going hungry. Love that there are things my kids can fix themselves. Love that I am NOT picky and like most foods. Love that I have a pretty good metabolism that allows me to eat lots of different kinds of foods. Love that I can try new recipes if I feel like it. Love even more when others do the cooking, and I just do the eating!

Attitude of Gratitude 2009

What a great idea! My friend Hannah is trying this. I thought I would play along. Sometimes when you are feeling down or overwhelmed it's easy to focus on the bad. I think lately that has been my problem. I just can't seem to get out of this slump. Hopefully this will help. I used to tell my YW group that no matter how depressed, sad, upset, lonely, frustrated, overwhelmed or mad you get at life, if you can write in your journal one thing each day that brings you joy, you can get up and move on. So taking my own advice, AND following Hannah's lead, I will post 3 things each day in November (in no particular order of importance--just what I am feeling that day) that I am grateful for (or even more simply--that bring me joy!)

1. I am grateful for Fall. I love everything about it. The chill in the air. The beautiful leaves. Football. Pulling out the sweaters and sweatshirts. Cuddling up in a blanket. Hot chocolate. Slippers. And did I mention football?

2. I am grateful for my kids. I know... a little cliche. But really, through the frustrations and tantrums and fights (all boys), I can't imagine my life without them. Even though at times I'm not a great mom, I hope I've taught them enough to go out and meet the world and life head on.

3. I am grateful for books. I love reading. I love escaping in a great book. I love all kinds of books. In fact, I sort of have an addiction (I probably need help). I love buying books. I love feeling the books. I love thinking about the books. I love looking for more books to buy. I have so many books on my shelves that I still haven't read because I just keep buying them. I guess if you are going to have an addiction, books might be an okay addiction to have, right? Yes, I am justifying.

I am officially a Gleek!

So I guess I'm officially a "gleek" or Glee fan (geek). I absolutely love this new show! Can't get enough of it! I re-watch the episodes, download and listen to the music and sing along! It is so witty, entertaining and funny. I don't know, maybe I secretly wanted to be in show choir during my high school years. (Hmm, maybe that's why I love karaoke.) I don't know what it is...but I love it! For those of you who have never heard of it, it's a new show on Fox on Wednesday nights. It is a musical comedy about a high school "glee club" or show choir. I love the singing and dancing. And even the songs I wouldn't normally listen to, I can't get enough of-- after they are performed on this show (such as Beyonce's "Single Ladies"). I will admit some people might find some of the content offensive such as sex, teenage pregnancy, or gay's "coming out", but really?...that's life! Deal with it. And while your at it, enjoy the ride...or in this case, the show!

Red Rock Relay Update!

I am eventually going to post about my Red Rock Relay Race I ran at the first part of this month. I am still trying to upload some other amazing pictures to post. So watch for it. But to peak your interest...it was the most challenging and amazing race I've ever run! More to come...

Running

Runners just do it. They run for the finish line even if someone else has reached it first. -Author Unknown

Hobble Creek Half--We Did It!!!

The Hobble Creek Half Marathon was Saturday, August 22. And we did it! I ran this last year with a time of 2 hours and 10 minutes. I vowed I'd never run it again. My knees were in excruciating pain and I literally did not run again from that day until March or April of this year! Well, I decided to sign up again and this time I made my friend, Julie do it with me. (James ran it again as well, but he's too fast for me--not like having a running buddy!) Our goal was to run it in 2 hrs and 10 min again knowing that was just under a 10 minute mile pace. But we decided we would be ok with 2 hrs 20 min. Well we ended up doing it in under 2:10. Julie sprinted the last half mile. She was a superstar, and finished in 2:08. I just couldn't find it in me to give it any more oomph than I was already squeezing out, and finished in 2:09. I still beat my last year's time by a minute and I'm THRILLED! I know it's only a minute but it seems like eternity when you are running! :) I loved training and running with Julie. I know those last 4 miles I held her back (though she won't admit it), but I was having a tough time. I wore my knee support braces and my knees did not hurt once! I never had to stop for the bathroom either which I was worried about. I just got to the point where mentally I wanted to walk. But I didn't. I kept going. Julie and I pushed each other and we made it! I only ended up with a couple of blisters and my calf muscles were a little sore, but overall, feel great! It is such an amazing and empowering thing to accomplish. Unlike last year, this time was a little more motivating. Instead of never wanting to run again (which is how I felt last time), this year I'm excited to train and try out different half marathons. I don't think I will ever do a Marathon (I'm not THAT motivated), but maybe the Disneyland Half, or the Moab Half, or the Provo River Half, or the Mapleton Midnight Half. Anyway, don't know what I'll sign up for, but am excited to keep running! And that's probably a good thing since I have our Red Rock Relay next week in Southern Utah! Can't wait!

Julie and I
(And yes I look dead in all these pictures. Hmm. Wonder why.)

James and I after the race. James by the way makes me so mad! I've been training like crazy and barely finished. He has only been running on weekends, sometimes skipping a couple weeks at a time, and still finished in 1:51! How does he do that?
It really doesn't seem fair. And it's so dang irritating!

Me looking like I need about a week of sleep!

Julie looking like it was a piece of cake!

Am I a Horrible Mother?

Oh, I was SO excited for school to start back up. Finally, I can get some good sleep again. Summer is not great for me. I love my kids, love having them around, but I get so irritated when I don't get enough sleep (graveyards do that to you) and when they are all home all summer long, I DON'T get enough sleep. In fact, I was so excited for school to start up, that I woke up and walked my kids to school, forgot to take First Day of School Pictures, and proceeded to come home, climb back in my bed and sleep for a couple more hours. Dirty house and all. It was heavenly. Blissful, even. But now I feel a tad bit guilty --like a horrible mother.

Why Must We Sleep?

I'm just wondering...why must we sleep? I could literally stay up playing on the computer, reading, writing, blogging, etc. if it weren't for sleep. (Oh wait, I do that already). Mainly because I'm screwed up and on night shift. But then I pay for it the next day. I have to sleep in or I'm a bitch with a capital B. Just ask my family. And it seems like my whole day is wasted. I don't get much done. Now I know why they say "Early to bed, early to rise, makes a man healthy, wealthy and wise." But it's just not fair for those of us who work night shifts. I can't just turn off my night brain at 9-10 pm because I SHOULD go to bed. People think just because you are NOT working tonight, that everything is normal and hunky dorey, but it's not! I can't sleep.

Don't get me wrong. I LOVE sleep! Really love it. Just wish I didn't need it or want it so bad all the time. And I hate having to plan my life around my sleep--once again just the night shift thing talking. And I do not have insomnia. Once I'm tired, I can fall asleep immediately. I come home from a night shift, change my clothes, climb in bed and I'm out!

It's just the idea of sleep that is currently bugging me. Just so ya know!

Today's Scattered Thoughts

• Think it's funny that we are all sitting here as a family, but have 3 laptops out.
  
• Love reading, want to go read a book.
• Just love being cancelled/put on call at work. I can't say "No." It doesn't matter if I'm missing out on the money, just love to stay home.
• I want to start "couponing" but don't know where to start. My friend, Danette just started and it's amazing! Need some tips. (Maybe the money I saved would make up for the time I refuse to go to work if given the chance.)
  
• School starts soon? Whoa! Where did the summer go?
• Want to go to Disneyland. Is that too much to ask?
• Wish I was more comfortable with my body. You would think running 20+miles a week would make a difference. Ugh.
  
• Feeling guilty for not posting much lately.
• Love talking to my friend Julie. We just "get" each other. Can you have a BFF at 36?
• Can't wait for our Red Rock Relay race. I'm more excited for that than for the Hobble Creek Half. I guess 'cause it's my team--that I created--all women! Girl Power!
• Miss my scrapbooking buddies. Gotta get with them soon.
• Wish I could materialize all the great ideas I have swarming around in my head.
  
• I am realizing that life's been good. Gotta keep enjoying it--each day, one day at a time.
  

Love a Good Book

Oooh, I absolutely LOVE it when I find good books on good deals. The DI is my favorite place to find books and today I found 9 books (for a total of $16). A couple of them were my favorites growing up, and all of the others were on my "to read" list! I'm so excited I can't believe it. Now, if I could just find more time to read all these great books, that would be awesome!

Red Rock Relay!

Yes, we are doing it! I put together a team of 12 people to do the Red Rock Relay in southern Utah. I am SOOOOO excited. It's similar to the Ragnar Relay I did last year. I was seriously having withdrawals from NOT doing Ragnar this year, so I found this new one in So. Utah that is going to be AMAZING and beautiful--and I get to run it with my friends and sisters. It's two vans of 6 people each. We run through night and day 180 miles. It starts at Brianhead and ends at Tuacahn theater in St. George. It will be so much fun (and a huge challenge). My friends and I ran 9 miles down the canyon yesterday in 95 minutes. The last mile was a killer, but I really feel pretty good today. Not as sore or tired as I thought I would be. I LOVE that I found friends to run with that are about my pace. James pushes me too hard, and my work friends that I did Ragnar with last year are all too fast. So I really look forward to running each week with my buddies. Yay for us being slow-pokes-haha! I will keep posting RRR updates on here as we get closer to our race. I am so excited! Can't wait.

YW 4th Year Hike

So I thought that being one of the ward camp directors meant we were also supposed to go on the 4th year hike with our girls. The stake organizes it (even though we went as a ward to camp this year). I even took work off to go. Apparently, I was the ONLY one that thought that! My friend, Julie, and I were the only ward leaders from the entire stake! What's up with that? And we only had 3 girls from our ward going. Whatever. We did have a good time (if by good time, you would consider sleeping on sheep poop, lumpy, tilted ground, being scared of the injured bear out there and basically not sleeping). When we got to our "campsite" (haha) there were sheep everywhere baa-ing to their hearts content and pooping all over our supposed tent sites. Ugh! The shepherd did take them up over the mountain after informing us that the bear was following the sheep and had been shot in the arm. What the ---? So we put all of our food and garbage up in a tree for the night and made the girls put their backpacks in a separate tent away from where we were all sleeping, but still....Ugh! Not to mention the 11 mile dirt road we had to travel to get to where our hike even started. I think my car probably needs new shocks now. LOL. Wow, I need an attitude adjustment. But, overall it was a good trip. No, seriously. I always have fun when I'm with Julie. And I do like spending time with the YW. So other than the complaints, we survived and lived to tell the tale!

Messed up Brain? Or just an Obsession?

Is something wrong with my brain? Or is it I'm just driven (possibly in the wrong things--hmm, my messy house, scattered junk piles; exhibit A and B) once I get an idea in my head. So ever since I stumbled upon the Red Rock Relay site, that's all I can think about?! I want to run (and organize) it soooo bad. I want to make it fun and unforgettable for those I recruit to run it with me. I want to challenge myself (and others) to excel beyond what we believe we are capable of. Why can't I focus all this energy and thought process into something really important in the grand scheme of life. So many other things I could accomplish. Not that running, exercising, spending time with friends is anything bad to focus energy in...I'm just a tad bit obsessed. Don't know why. Hmmm, maybe my brain is messed up after all.

Relay Anyone?

Ok, so I'm going through withdrawals since I didn't run the Ragnar Wasatch Back Relay this year. It was such an empowering experience last year. So I'm wondering if anyone is interested in running the Red Rock Relay this year?!!! Please?!!! I found this relay by accident but am dying to run it because it starts at Brianhead resort and ends at Tuacahn in St. George. You run through Zions, Snow Canyon State Park and all these really amazing and beautiful places. It would really be awesome...but we need a team of 12. It is September 4-5. Plenty of time to train still if anyone is interested. I wouldn't mind being the team captain and organizer if we could pull this off. You would run 3 legs during a 24 hour period--each leg anywhere between 3-8 miles. We live in the vans and just have tons of fun. Or...we could do the Ragnar Relay in Las Vegas which is Oct. 9-10 (even more time to train). Either one would be awesome with beautiful scenery and loads of fun. But we need to decide NOW so I can rearrange, finagle, or beg my way out of work those weekends. The entry fee for either one is around $80-85 each. Then we would split gas, food and hotel (for the night before). Come on; 180 miles, 12 team members, two vans, lots of music, no kids, little sleeping and burning loads of calories! What do you think? Here are some links if you are interested and want more info. Red Rock Relay and Ragnar Relay

Some Scattered Thoughts

• Still running--ran 7.2 miles on Saturday with Julie. Nothing great, or fast, but we did it. Did 3 miles today.
• Still haven't signed up for Speedy Spaniard or Freedom Run. Still want to. Still don't want to run alone.
  
• Tired of whining kids. Really, how long is summer break?
• Not loving that my 17 year old spends so much time with his girlfriend--I guess payback is a bitch, right?
• Love that reading with my kids is getting them excited about the stories--they beg me to read so they can see what happens next. Yay!
• Wish I was more committed to eating healthy so I could lose the weight I've put back on this year.
  
• Tired of waxing my upper lip--maybe my hormones are messed up.
  
• Wish I could plan a family vacation that doesn't break the bank that everyone is actually excited about--and find a good time to do it. Ugh.
• Getting excited to watch football games this fall.
  
• Wondering why the washer and dishwasher both had to go out at the same time?
• Wondering why God created weeds?
• Wondering why everyone can't just get along and be happy?
• Wondering if sibling rivalry (or beating the crap out of each other) is just a sign of failed parenting?
  
• Wondering why there aren't more hours in a day--and would I waste them if there were?
• Feeling happy that I got to go to Girl's Camp. It was perfect-where we went, when we went, and what we did! (See my family blog.)
  
• Excited to see my high school friends this week. We are finally getting together for lunch.
• Hoping for some girl scrapbooking time this weekend.
  
• Tired of making dinner--same old stuff everyday. Wishing I had money for a personal chef.
  
• Pondering the last 18 years of marriage...wow! 18 years! Happy Anniversary to me!
• Tired of work. Tired of wondering if and when I will ever get ahead. Just when things seem to be on the up and up, another expense pops up.
• Thinking I really need to get a family picture done soon.

Yard Sales

I had a yard sale yesterday, or I guess technically my sister did. I got rid of a lot of stuff, made a little extra cash and the rest got hauled to the DI. I know some people think a yard sale is a waste of time...but here is why it's not for me. Even if I only make $60-70 (in the past I've made a couple hundred dollars), it motivates me to de-junk and clean things out. Sure, I could take things to the DI any old time, but do I? No! I don't. But, if I know there is a Yard Sale coming up, for some reason it motivates me to clean out and de-junk and THAT is such a good feeling. THAT alone makes it worth it to me. The hardest thing is not turning around and buying everyone else's junk while I'm there. Been there, done that. But this time....I was pretty good. Just ended up with a couple books(and we all know how much I LOVE books and reading), a couple pieces of clothing (since probably 90% of my wardrobe comes from my sister's DI bags) and a container for my scrapbook stuff. So overall, a good day!

Hello Fellow Runner Friends!

Ok, so I've decided I want to run the Freedom Run 10K on July 4th. It's only $20 and you get a microfiber shirt and a finisher's medal. I've never run it before, but am not working that weekend and thought it sounded fun! Here is the website for anyone that wants to join me: http://www.freedomfestival.org/run. James doesn't want to run it. He wants to sleep in, so I need a friend. Anyone interested. It's just 6.2 miles. Also, I am planning to run the Speedy Spaniard 10K on July 24th. Here is the website for that one. http://www.spanishfork.org/newsevents/events/fiestadays/activities24.php. I'm not signing up until someone agrees to join me. It's always nice to run with a friend. Even if you get separated, you can cheer each other on at the finish line! Plus we can bring a camera to document our great accomplishment on our blogs!

Running Update!

So I haven't been great at posting, but I am running! I ran the Live WElle 5K this morning. I even ran 5 miles last week! It felt pretty good. The first couple of miles are always the hardest no matter how far I run. Once I get warmed up, I can usually keep going fairy easily. I am signed up for the Art City Days 5K June 6 with my kids and the Hobble Creek Half Marathon in August. I am also hoping to run the Speedy Spaniard 10K on the 24th of July. I did that last year and it was pretty fun. So, although I'm not great at updating my blog, and although I'm not a fast runner, I am running!!!! Now if I could just eat healthier and lose a few pounds in the process, life would be good.

I gotta get runnin'

So my friend Julie asked if I wanted to run the Hobble Creek Half Marathon with her. I ran it last year, but this will be her first time. I agreed. Last year I ran it in 2 hours 10 min. Not the fastest runner in the world, but I held my own. But now....my stomach is turning, my heart is racing and my skin is clammy just thinking about it. But we all know I need something to get me motivated again and since it seems the only way I will actually continue running is if I have something to work towards, I agreed. Ugh, what was I thinking? Anyone up for joining us?

Spring De-Junking

I have been spring cleaning, or rather de-junking. See my list below as I check things off! (Me and my lists). I have lots of boxes and bags to haul to the D.I. or my sister's yard sale which I think she is planning for May 9. Lots more to clean out before then. It feels so good when you actually get rid of stuff. I don't know why I keep so much junk. I always think "I'll use that later." Yeah, right! But the other amazing thing is, no matter how often I de-clutter or de-junk, I still feel like it tends to multiply and in a few years I'll be right back where I started. I don't feel like I buy a lot of junk, but I guess I will have to take a long hard look at my buying habits to avoid this in the future. Ugh! Almost every single year I do a yard sale with my sisters and I still have way too much junk! How in the world is that possible? Maybe it's just that each year--each time I re-look at things, I'm willing to get rid of more because it seems as time goes by, the sentimental value, or what I thought was sentimental value, decreases or diminishes. Yeah, I think that's it. The older I get, the less I care. Ah Ha! Or maybe it's the older I get, the less I need--yeah let's go with that one!

The Festival of Colors--Welcoming Spring!

We took the family to the Holi-Festival of Colors at the Krishna Temple to welcome the Spring Season. See my family blog for more info on the festival. Anyway, it was really fun and exciting and I decided there is so much to be grateful for. So many wonderful things in this season to experience. I am suddenly reminded that life is good. I am now so excited for a new season. So here are some things I am so looking forward to this Spring:

• Beautiful Flowers, especially Tulips
• Spending Spring Break with the kids
• All the beautiful colors
• Rain
• Spring Cleaning
• Planting a garden
• Warm, but not too hot weather
• Riding with the car windows down--letting my hair blow in the wind
• Running outside, instead of on the treadmill
• Fresh Strawberries
• Wearing sandals
• Going to the kids' Track Meets

I already feel refreshed and renewed! I am so looking forward to a clean, fresh start. Because technically, isn't every day a clean, fresh start? Spring just makes it that much more obvious!

March 26, 2009

Why is it women tend to feel guilty? About small things, big things, silly things, un-deserved as well as deserved things. I feel like such an inadequate mom lately. I get frustrated with my kids easily. I tend to hold a grudge so after I become angered, I just KEEP getting angrier until I feel I could explode. I have always admired that about my husband. Even if he gets mad at the kids, yells at them or gets upset with them, he is great at turning around and giving them a big kiss or "I love you." Not me. It just festers inside me the rest of the day. Even if I want to get rid of it, I can't. I just can't seem to move on. Until the next day. Each day is a new one. A fresh start. But somehow I always tend to lose it fairly early. I just want those days to be mine. MINE. For keeps. Mine to enjoy and love and laugh. Not be angry or frustrated or upset. My kids often say, "You're mad at me!" And I say "No, I'm not mad, just frustrated." So Peyton will say, "What's the difference?" That's a good question. What is the difference? Why once I'm on the edge, does it just keep getting worse? Why can't I just laugh and move on? That will be my goal to work on. I really need to focus on positive energy. I need to release the negative in my life and move on. I need to focus on the joys and the things that really make me happy. So what does really make me happy, anyway? I don't seem to remember. There's always something to do, somewhere to go, things that can't wait--even if they can. I need to start again. Start loving. Stop hating. Start enjoying. Start feeling. Start living. And I will.... starting NOW!

Weekly Update-

Last Saturday, I helped the older kids CLEAN their rooms before going to work. We ended up with about 3-4 big bags of garbage and un-needed stuff and 3 big garbage bags of clothes to take to the DI--just from those two rooms! Project "CLEAN YOUR ROOMS"--Success! I also finished going through my scrapbook magazines and pulling out articles I wanted, so I could get rid of the rest. Probably about 100 magazines! Wow, the clutter sure collects over the years. But as for this week, Ugh, tomorrow is Friday and I still haven't exercised or worked on my "organizing projects". I guess that's what happens when you work three nights in a row. Oh well. I'm learning that when you work, you just need to be flexible or you could actually go crazy thinking of all the things you didn't do. So I will concentrate on what I did do this week. I worked at the Book Fair at the school TWICE. I helped deliver lots of babies at work and even realized one patient's baby was breech while checking her, (which is great because then we were able to safely deliver the baby by c-section), I made dinner (at least a few times), I filled out my March madness brackets and printed them off for all my kids to fill out, and I ran kids about a million different places--you know, mom the taxi driver. Hopefully, this weekend will be much more productive. I do have a couple kid's track meets to go to, but I really do enjoy THOSE kind of distractions! Hmm, I should probably go to bed now, but after three nights on, I'm just not tired yet. Ugh!

Organizing Projects-List

So it's back to work tonight after 7 nights off. Ugh. Real life calls. Anyway, here is my list of organizing projects I came up with. I am posting it here so I can update it as I go. I am sure I will find new things to add as well, but it's a start:

Kids room
1. dresser--CHECK
2. beds-shelves and under bed--CHECK
3. closet--CHECK
4. game console/TV stand--CHECK
5. book shelf--CHECK
6. toys--CHECK
7. empty drawer bin (by door)--CHECK
8. board games--CHECK

My Room
9. dresser--CHECK
10. closet--CHECK
11. small night stand
12. white cupboard
13. boxes in closet
14. James closet
15. under bed

Computer Room
16. desk
17. book shelf
18. white dresser
19. box of computer extras (cords, etc)--CHECK
20. framed pictures to hang (still in box)
21. box of PT stuff
22. organize photos-several boxes
23. Remembrance/Memory boxes-several boxes
24. scrapbook magazines-go thru and toss--CHECK
25. sort/clean out old school books

Family Room Corner
26. File Cabinet 1--CHECK
27. File Cabinet 2--CHECK
28. Pile of stuff needing filed
29. scrapbooking stuff- several boxes
30. school project boards/poster boards
31. Find place for card table/chairs
32. James school stuff-go thru
33. Lamps- get rid of?
34. TV stand
35. Videos/DVDS- sort and get rid of--CHECK
36. Burn DVDS out of old movies

Storage Room
37. shelves
38. freezer--CHECK
39. xmas boxes-sort/get rid of things we don't use -CHECK
40. get rid of old paint
41. get rid of old bottled beans-clean bottles for canning
42. organize food storage
43. coat bin?
44. blanket bin?
45. sports stuff/balls bin?

Extra Room (Tanner's claimed computer/tv/guitar room)
46. Desks
47. Bookshelf
48. closet
49. boxes of PT stuff-several to sort and get rid of
50. YW boxes -CHECK
51. Go thru computer disks--CHECK
52. File Cabinet 3
53. Sort through CD cases--CHECK

Wow! Even if I only did one project a week, it would take me all year. I better get moving. I'm so excited for a totally uncluttered home though. Yippee!

Today...Was a Good Day!

Don't you love when you have a really productive day? Because I work nights, I don't feel my days are very productive lately. My internal clock is so messed up, I tend to sleep in. Luckily, kiddos are in school and I CAN sleep in...whenever I want. Yawn. I sometimes get up with the boys, then crawl back in bed once they are out the door. I guess that is what graveyards will do to you. Always counting hours of sleep. Always afraid I won't get enough sleep. I always do. Probably more than if I slept at night. Well, today, I woke up. I got up. And I got moving. My bed called to me--ever so softly at first, then it screamed at me. But I blocked the noise from my head (with some rather loud music) and stayed up. I got so many little things done I felt awesome! I ran 2 miles, did pilates, changed and washed all the sheets and bedding, finished the laundry (yes ALL of it--for a few minutes my laundry was actually DONE--until kids started showering and getting jammies on, that is), folded and put away the finished laundry, went to get some groceries, made my list of organizing tasks, read to the kids, cleaned out TWO tall file cabinets (I threw away 25 pounds of paper stuff/bills that have been sitting there--and yes I weighed it-for fun), made a delicious chicken crockpot dinner, made a menu, balanced the checkbook, did the dishes, looked up some first aid tidbits to teach the scouts, and taught some first aid tidbits to the 8 year old, rambunctious scouts. Phew! And now I am tired. I should go to bed. Yawn.

Organizing 101

I am DETERMINED to get organized. So why did I title this post Organizing 101? Maybe it's because I'm thinking it's the beginning or "Basics". Or maybe, in the back of my mind I know there are probably about that many projects I need to work on. Breathe. Check out some of my favorite organizing sites (listed to the right) I've found to help me in my endeavors. I'm tired of my house looking like a pig sty. Well, at least the parts of the house that aren't commonly seen--bedrooms, closets, computer room, etc. So I have decided I will conquer one project at a time. Baby steps. Once I find a system that works, it shouldn't be too hard to keep up, right? So I will make a list of projects--even breaking the bigger ones into smaller ones so they seem more manageable. Then I will update that list as I accomplish my goals. Ok, deep breath, don't hyperventilate. Just thinking of these "junk piles" or "messes" makes me feel totally overwhelmed. But I WILL CONQUER! Slowly. Calmly. One thing at a time. Whew! Now that it's written down, I must do it. I am after all a list-maker. I love making lists and goals and then crossing things off as I finish them. So in reality, this is probably the ONLY way I will get organized. By making lists. By forcing myself to face the reality and horror of my cluttered life. Ready, set, GO!

Running (or lack of) Update

So I didn't do so hot this week. Last week I ran three times, Tuesday, Thursday and Friday. I did 2 miles each day and my times got better each time. I even did Pilates on Friday after running, and I felt good, overall. This week, I only ran once...on Thursday. I am blaming it on the fact I worked 3 nights in a row (Sun, Mon, Tues) and then Kade's birthday and Peyton's baptism (including cleaning my house for a luncheon afterward). But...there is always something to blame my "not exercising" on. It's always still just an excuse. The important thing is that I can do better next week! Just because I had a bad week doesn't mean I give up. But...my house is clean! Well, relatively clean--Clean for me I should say. My clean house means the bathrooms are cleaned, dishes are done, dusting, vacuuming, and the kitchen is picked up, swept and mopped. Anything more is just icing on the cake! One of these days my house will be organized and cleaned at the same time. I have so many drawers, piles, filing cabinets, and scrapbooking supplies to sort through and organize...well, maybe that day will never come. Oh well. Life is good. Who said you have to have a clean house anyway? Right? One thing at a time. And next week, I will RUN!

I started running again

I ran today! Well sorta. I walked part of it because my lungs hurt so bad (probably doesn't help that I've been sick with a cough and cold for the past week). I used the treadmill. I only went 2 miles and it took me 26 minutes to go that far. My lungs hurt, my knees hurt and I felt like puking my guts out, but I guess you have to start somewhere right? I honestly haven't run or really exercised since the Hobble Creek Half last August. Last year, I started running March 7 and ran the Wasatch Back, Speedy Spaniard and the Hobble Creek Half (plus a couple 5K's). As long as I had a race ahead, I was motivated. I decided it's about that time again, so I better get moving. Ugh. I must admit, I feel much better physically as well as mentally when I'm working out. Maybe I can get out of this slump and quit feeling so lazy. I'll try to post my progress here, mostly to keep me motivated. So, here's to working out...

50 Random Things About Me

On Facebook several people have done a "25 Random things about Me List". I kept putting it off. I decided to go for it and started typing. I actually came up with 50, so here are 50 random things about me in no particular order.

1. I LOVE to read. Always have, always will. Now, even more--it's like an escape for me.
2. I used to fall asleep early--just sitting down to watch TV and I was out. Now, I stay up all night. I just can't go to bed early. Those almost four years of working graveyards have really screwed up my internal clock.
3. I've been married for over 17 years. We've had our ups and downs, but I still love him ;)
4. I hate to clean...which is why my house is never spotless.
5. I hate to do laundry. It can sit in a pile for days just waiting to be folded.
6. I love Disneyland and am always trying to find times to go. It's harder when the kids are in Jr. High and High School and can't miss as easily.
7. I love listening to music.
8. I really don't like to cook. I love food. Especially if someone else cooks it!
9. I have to drive everywhere...trips, dates, etc. I get carsick if I am not driving.
10. I often worry about how I'm raising my kids and how bad I've screwed them up.
11. Fall is my favorite season. I love everything about it. The cool, crisp air. The sweater weather. The colors and leaves. And football!
12. I like playing games with my kids but hate that they are so competitive and always end up fighting.
13. I love the rain. I love how it smells.
14. One of my biggest pet peeves is when others leave the kitchen cupboards open. REALLY? It takes a half a second more to close them!
15. I'm not a very good home decorator and therefore do not have pictures or decor on my walls.
16. I love my job as an RN in Labor and Delivery, but hate going to work. I wish I could just stay home all day every day. Guess I'm lazy.
17. I really don't love reading to my little boys. I get frustrated and irritated at times. I wish I loved it. I still do it, out of guilt I guess.
18. I am realizing from my list that I'm not a very good homemaker. (See #'s 4, 5, 8, 15)
19. I am always wishing I had time to finish projects, but it just seems nothing ever gets done.
20. I like to dip my toast in my hot chocolate. My kids love it too. I just thought that was how you ate it. My husband thinks I'm crazy. My mom thinks I'm crazy. I learned it from my Dad.
21. I always think about working out, but just can't get up the oomph to start again. I love how it makes me feel once I do, though.
22. My hands get really dry and cracked in the winter. At least a couple of my boys' do to. They come home looking like they have been in fist fights.
23. My family thinks Sizzler is "fine dining". How sad is that?
24. I totally feel outnumbered in my home with 4 boys and a husband. Usually it's ok. Sometimes my hormones get in the way and I feel like I'm the last one to know things or be included in a conversation and I get MAD. Why can boys talk to Dad easier than Mom? It's just not fair.
25. I like to just "vegge out" but then feel guilty for wasting time.
26. I feel like I have lots of friends but not many close friends.
27. I love scrapbooking, journaling, blogging, and family history, but need to do more. I haven't scrapbooked since I went back to school (a few years now).
28. I'm super proud of my boys.
29. I'm not very photogenic.
30. I hate that I started getting gray hair at 30. It's just not fair. I still blame the meningitis.
31. I hate my wrinkles around my eyes--especially when I smile. I asked my dermatologist about it. He said with my skin type, and my slender build--that was just how it was going to be. He flat out told me I could be fat or have more wrinkles. Whatever.
32. I love that I don't have to stress about my weight too much. But know I would feel better anyway if I worked out.
33. I love my husband's sense of humor and wish I could just let go and laugh more.
34. I like to make lists. I like the feeling of crossing stuff off my lists.
35. I like to look for the little joys in every day life. Even when I'm down.
36. I don't ever want my boys to move out. I know that day is not far off, and I'm pretty sure I will cry.
37. I love to kiss my boys on the cheek when they are sleeping.
38. I couldn't live without my cell phone. Just knowing my kids can get ahold of me if they need is worth it.
39. I always think of others but am not good at sending cards or making phone calls to let them know.
40. I sometimes will wear my PJ's all day. (I guess part of that is that I sleep in the day after work)
41. I love that I'm done having kids and love this phase of my life, but miss being needed.
42. I pay the bills and know my husband would be totally lost if I died.
43. I don't take the time to enjoy long baths. I shower instead.
44. I took 3 years of French in High school and still can't speak/understand it. I wish I could. I also wish I knew Spanish. It would really be helpful in my job.
45. I love to go out to eat. I especially love PF Chang's.
46. I have hundreds (maybe thousands) of photos in boxes that still need organized, scrapbooked or at least put in photo albums.
47. I love photography. Wish I was better at it. Wish I had a better camera too.
48. I get annoyed easily. Especially if my kids are fighting.
49. My favorite flower is the Tulip.
50. I almost never buy myself clothes. Hate spending money on me. I love getting hand-me-down clothes from my sisters, or digging through their DI bags. :)

Overwhelmed

Why is it that some days you just feel "Ugh!". I feel overwhelmed, overworked, under-appreciated, underpaid and have no ambition to get up and go. Granted I've been sick the last couple days with a head cold, body aches, cough and congestion but I feel like I've just wasted my week and I don't even care. I'm also sick of feeling like I have to do everything for everyone. It's like no one can make their own food, finish their own assignments, clean their own rooms, do their own chores, etc. Really? Maybe that's just part of being a mom. Maybe that's just part of being a woman. Maybe that's just part of being the only female in a house full of boys and testosterone. Whatever. Well, I think I will go curl up on my bed and read a book. It's not like anything is getting done anyway. I'm just feeling sorry for myself. Might as well do it in my room with a good book--or rather a good escape.

Blog All about Me

I have decided to create a blog that is all about me--and my life. This is separate from the family blog. This is just me. My thoughts, my hopes, my dreams, my flaws, my fears--the scattered little pieces that make me who I am. Hopefully, I can include scattered bits and pieces such as recipies, gift ideas, journaling thoughts, holiday ideas and traditions, quotes and inspirations, work-out or training tips, goals, songs, books, etc. My goal is to learn a little more about myself through this journaling (blogging) experience and figure out what really makes me "ME".